“The Cycle of Life”

In one week, I experienced the unexpected death of my Father and the birth of my first grandchild.

 

For the last two weeks I have been on a rollercoaster of emotions.

 

For someone who has become fascinated with emotions and human behaviour this is a very interesting time in my life.

 

Most people have been comfortable to talk about the birth, but uncomfortable to talk about the death.

 

Psychologists all agree that overthinking is the biggest cause of unhappiness. Getting stuff out of your head by talking about it or writing it down is the recommended pathway to clarity and inner peace.

 

But I am finding that doing this is quite difficult.

 

I am constantly being emotionally pulled in two directions by the opposing feelings of grief and joy.

 

Is it possible to feel grief and joy at the same time?

 

How do I make sense of this emotional “togue of war”

 

Like most “emotional problem solving” 99% of the early stages of grieving is done in your head. But unfortunately, this does not get you very far, it’s very hard to think your way through your grief.

 

“Grief and love are cojoined, you don’t get one without the other.” Jandy Nelson

 

Dad’s funeral was a celebration of a life well lived.

 

He was six months shy of turning one hundred when he passed away. His was a wonderful, long, joy filled life in which he achieved so much and was constantly surrounded by a loving community of family and friends.

 

It is a shame that the care and attention you receive after a parent’s death is short lived, but your sense of loss lives on for as long as your memories.

 

However, in my instance, the joy of a grandchild will last a lifetime.

 

“Joy and beauty are everywhere. It is up to each of us as to whether we choose to look for it or not.” Unknown

 

For now, two weeks after Dad’s passing and a week after my Granddaughters’ birth, I am just trying to focus on the positive and to soldier on functioning the best I can.

 

“How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”  Winnie The Pooh

 

PS: I am feeling that I will have more to say about grief on the other side of the Christmas break.

 

Have a wonderful Christmas.

 

Thanks for reading,

Stay safe and soldier on.